Wednesday, November 14, 2012

A Sad Decision Made

It was with great regret that we decided it was time for my dear mother-in-law to go into a nursing home. I had hoped I could keep her here with us until she left this earth. Unfortunately it all got too much. We have found her a lovely place in Bunbury and on Monday, Alan and I took her to the home. We told her on Saturday evening but she had forgotten.

I have been in every day to make sure all is going well and her settling in is not too traumatic. There have been some bumps in the road not helped by the fact that she can't articulate what she wants and needs.

Today a very nice gentleman came from aged care to assess her to see what level of care she needed. She has been assessed as high care although fortunately not going to into the dementia unit as she would be distressed there. We are so thankful for this. Also, fortunately they can offer her a room at the facility in another area of the nursing that will look after all her needs.

Oh the guilt! I feel like the wicked witch of the west. I know it is for the best as I was struggling to look after her. She had a fall on Sunday. Luckily Dr Smith and Nurse Smith were on hand to make sure all was well.

I know this is for the best.


  1. Im sorry to hear this, its the best for all of you by the sounds of it *hugs*

  2. Janine I can sympathize with you. We had to make the same decision in September with my MIL. Do not feel guilty. Until we went through this ourselves I always thought that I would never put a parent into a home now I have made my son promise me not to keep me at his home when I am unable to look after myself.

    It will take her a while to settle down and for you to come to terms with it, if you want to chat email me.

  3. MOTH and his siblings went through this with his mum 18 months ago, never an easy decision but it was for the best. She has now settled and the routine etc has helped her immensely.

  4. First off, the wicked witch of the west had better taste in shoes than you, so I know you ain't her. Secondly you and I both know that she needs 24 hour care now, and as much as we all know that you're an amazing woman, you are not Super Woman and need sleep just as much as the rest of us. I'm proud of the strength you had to take care of her for so long and what it courage it took to realize that it was time.

    Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some chickens to harass :)

  5. Well I want better shoes but you know my feet don't like shoes so can't be done. And I love you too.

  6. You've done the right thing! Just read Nicola's posts to see why. when my grandad passed away everyone said to my Mum "don't take your mother in" they were so right!

    You'll have a much better relationship with her if you're not the on-call carer.

  7. Thanks for stopping by my blog, it's always nice to have new visitors.
    Thank you for your comment on my Shores of Hawk Run Hollow.
    I'm sorry you have had to face this decision, it seems to happening to quite a few bloggers recently.